Musicians are the least courageous class of workers when they go on strike because they are always unwilling to face the music.
Jokes
“Tommy,” said a father to his son, “Have you been at those six apples I put in the cupboard?”
“Father,” said Tommy, looking into his eyes, “I have not touched one.”
“Well how is it that your mother found five apple cores in your bedroom, and there is only one left on the plate?”
“Well that,” said Tommy, as he dashed toward the door, “is the one I didn’t touch!”
Visitor - But there is an essential difference between right and wrong.
Convict - Oh, there wouldn’t have been so much difference if I had a good lawyer.
“Did you ever have all you wanted of anything?” asked Meandering Mike.
“Yes,” answered Plodding Pete. “Two things - advice and water.”
The Mayor of Boston, Josiah Quincy, told with glee of how he was once identified by a laborer who was enlightening a friend. “That is Josiah Quincy” said the laborer. “And who is Josiah Quincy?” demanded the friend. “Why don’t you know? He is the grandson of the statue out there in the yard.”